Carol Muske-Dukes

AUDITION
February 24, 2017 Muske-Dukes Carol

AUDITION

(Paris, Hair, 1971)

 

Once through an ancient stage door, past a sign

“L’audition”, I’m ushered by hip Mercury, cocked

 

torch lighting his winged brow. My number’s the one

he hands me, though I don’t know how: to act or

 

if I can belt “Easy to Be Hard”. Which I do.

How can people be so heartless? I ask the

 

high notes. The day before I’d quoted de

Beauvoir with equal fire as a Metro creep

 

touched my leg, whining at me off-key. I shouted

my textbook French, which he instantly corrected.

 

Now an anonymous voice from a darkened row: asking

for more & that evening a callback at my Cité U dorm.

 

Direct to onstage, piping high notes at a Hell’s

Angel, missing back-of-chorus cues, half-rehearsed.

The first bars of “Aquarius” sound & I climb, hand

over hand, from scaffolding below the side balconies

 

into scripted light. But the Tribe didn’t take to me.

The only time I took my clothes off at the nude scene,

 

first act’s end, they hid my tie-dyed jeans. I couldn’t be

naked the way they were. I think everything is real.

 

Nude all interlude, I search, lost, behind the great

moth-eaten sway of cloth, beneath hanging skies.

 

In my forever-auditioning blond body, begging in each

failed language: “My clothes?”, “Pourquoi, mes amis?”

 

Funny joke, but these bright fake tryouts at Life, ongoing,

take a toll. Due to be paid up Mercury’s road. Everything

 

is real to me, even the big joke war over a woman’s body.

What I shout back, exiting, is how it will all be fought —

 

in a future when She, Great Moon, rises up, floods the Seventh

House, & Jupiter aligns peacefully at last, with his partner, Mars.

CAROL MUSKE-DUKES is an OWL (Old Wise Lady or OWW, Old Wise Woman) now officially retired from USC, after over thirty years as a full professor with tenure and SOLO founder of the PhD program in Creative Writing/literature. Glad to be free! Glad to be free to express myself beyond the restrictions of academia within the Corporate University – and also glad to be able to share my thoughts on the Demise of Creative Writing.
Besides my many years at USC — (I’ve taught at Columbia Univ. MFA program, Univ. of Iowa Writers Workshop, UC Irvine MFA Program, Univ. of Virginia, George Washington Univ. (Jenny McKean Moore Lecturer) etc.
I have published 16 books, poems, novels and essay collections – as well as co-edited anthologies. Most recent book of poems, BLUE ROSE, (Penguin) was a long list Pulitzer prize finalist in 2019. Other awards, etc. Guggenheim, NEA, Ingram Merrill, Castagnola award, 7 Pushcarts , Barnes & Noble Writer for Writers award, etc. National Book Award finalist, LATimes Book Prize finalist, Witter Bynner Library of Congress award. California Poet Laureate (2008-2011) + NYTimes Most Notable Books. Published & anthologized widely + also: I write & review for the NYTimes Book Review, LATimes, (former Poetry columnist, LA Times),. NY Times Op Ed, + Magazine, The New Yorker, Huffington Post, etc. Rea Visiting Distinguished Writer, Univ. of Virginia , + Harmon Writer Residency, Baruch College, NY.
But I remain a writer first – teachers of CW aren’t always loyal to writing itself – says the OWL.